Can't Never Could but I Will

September 20, 2017

   This is probably going to be one of my shortest blogs to date because frankly, I don’t have any time to invest in a long one and that’s exactly what I want to vent about.  For the past month exactly, I have been spread way too thin!  From live broadcasts to working out as if I’m competing in the Olympics, I’ve been going, going, going! Those tasks don’t sound too daunting but on top of work and working out, I’ve been planning a trip to California.  If you’ve read my previous blogs, you know I’ve been battling with a little decision and some of the troubles were deciding if I should go on this trip or not.  One of the problems was that this trip was going to take all of my vacation days from work and this trip wasn’t going to be a vacation at all. 

     It wasn’t until my deceased Nanny sent me a sign telling me that I must go.  You can read about that in my blog titled, “The Day the Earth stood still” and just as she told me to, I booked my flight to Los Angeles and started preparing my trip.  The main goal of going to LA was for a Survivor premiere party and I’m repeating myself by saying this but if you’ve read my past blogs, you’d know, I am a Survivor junkie!  I absolutely love the game and many castaways have left huge impressions on my life.  One of those being the villain of the seasons: SamoaHeroes vs. Villians, and Redemption Island, the self-proclaimed King of Survivor, Russell Hantz.  He just started a podcast not too long ago that I’ve been really active with and it was his Survivor premiere party that I was going to.

     One might think, ohhh a party, that’s a vacation but no, my goal was to go out there and network my butt off!  While being an actor is the main goal, I’d definitely play the game of Survivor if asked because I, myself have asked God several times that if I wasn’t supposed to play then to take the passion out of my heart.  He has yet to diminish the thought so if I’m asked, I’m there but since God doesn’t tell us the direct path to our purpose, I planned on making the most opportunities as humanly possible for myself while in LA.  I thought it would be good to contact everyone I know from California, anyone that knows anyone, and even reach out to strangers such as agents, managers, or casting directors.

     A few amazing friends did set me up with people they know.  For instance, I’m having coffee with a woman who used to work at our radio station who’s now an On-Air Personality out there and I’ll be having lunch with a man who used to be a casting agent and then I’m having dinner with sisters who already have a talent agent in Los Angeles, which is HUGE because getting good representation is one of the hardest tasks for any entertainer.  By meeting all of these people and anyone really, I want to pick their brains and soak up as much advice as I can!  Of course at the Survivor Premiere Party I was going to get in Russell’s head but unfortunately, right before I started writing this blog, his producer notified me that Mr. Villain wouldn’t be making an appearance.  While I was immediately stressed about the cancellation, I couldn’t dare be mad because Russell and his family had to deal with Hurricane Harvey.

     I couldn’t be upset anyways because I feel as if my own heart, my Nanny, and even God told me to go and I must stand by my theory that everything happens for a reason.  What brought me to write this blog, which by the way, I’ve already spent 47 minutes too much time on, is that a co-worker came into my office this morning and told me that I was wasting my time on unrealistic goals. That person used the words, “you can’t do that” and they said that before I knew Russell scratched the party.  I should be devastated by the cancellation itself and especially by the doubt of my peer, but no, I’ve got something to do and by galley, I’m still going to the city of angels to give it all I got!  I've been grinding too long for my dreams to ever even think about giving up and just this past month alone, I have spent every day doing something to try to get me a hand up and ya know what, when I get that break, I’m going to remember all the moments my back was against the wall with someone telling me, “I can’t”.

     Can’t never could, that’s what my Dad says but I can and I will.  And who's place is it to tell me how to spend my time anyways?  I've got a goal and I'm gonna get it!  You can too, whatever your dream is.  Never Give Up!  Believe in yourself, even if no one else does.  As Will Smith’s character says in The Pursuit of Happyness, “People can’t do something themselves, they want to tell you, you can’t do it. You want something, go get it. Period”.